I’ve had a few requests so here it is, the un-killable cake. I made more this week (goodbye waist!) and forgot to take it out of the oven for like 15 minutes, and it was still fine. I’d turned the oven off at least. Right, let’s get to it.
200g/7oz self raising flour
225g/8oz caster sugar
25g/1oz cocoa powder
splash of vanilla
Preheat the oven to 180°c.
Mix the dry ingredients then rub in margarine. Mix the wet ingredients and beat. Combine.
Bake for 30-35 minutes. I usually stick it in what I think is a 9 inch round tin.
This is how the recipe pretty much reads in my book. It originally came from the Be-Ro baking book via my lovely friend Jannine, and I have since had and lost 2 Be-Ro books. They sell for about 80p, but last time I was in morrisons I couldn’t find a replacement. Luckily I had it in my recipe notebook, although it looks like this through my terrible handwriting and overuse:
The original calls for 5tbsp of evaporated milk and 5tbsp of water, but Jannine and I both thought, nah, that’s just milk, and replaced it. Because evaporated milk is gross, and I never want to buy it. I also usually have to cook it a little longer as the batter is really quite runny. I’ve swapped butter in for the marg, and I’ve never used caster sugar, just bog standard granulated, because when I make cake it’s usually on a whim, and who has caster sugar just in the cupboard? Aside from you know, grown up people who bake properly.
Now for the icing, because of reasons.
9oz sieved icing sugar
3tbsp hot milk
1tbsp cocoa powder
Melt the butter, add the hot milk and vanilla, then the cocoa powder and sugar. Beat it to death, done. If you want it thick enough to spread (like the above picture) add a bit more sugar. I can’t tell you how much more really because I just go til it looks right. Also I tend to guess with the cocoa too, but basically, you can’t go wrong with this either. Both last a few days, which is more than enough.
So there it is, make it, eat it, and curse me on the last slice. If you intend to take it somewhere or share, and you have willpower like mine, make it right before you need it, because it is very much moreish.
Also if anyone does manage to ruin it, let me know and I’ll make you some kind of award, because seriously, you’ve got recipe destroying skillz.
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